“Lock up your libraries if you like; but there is no gate, no lock, no bolt that you can set upon the freedom of my mind.”
Sunday, December 14, 2014
Life is about living not fearing...
I have always thought, I was never afraid of anything. Iwas am a tomboy who is ready to try anything new or different. I am not afraid of heights or
darkness. I never had stage fright or meeting new people. I was not afraid of
exams thou when results are to be announced I could feel my butterflies waking
from their sleep in my tummy. But that’s normal! Years of boarding life, made
me love hostel life, so no fear in moving away from family too. I love speed
and no amounts of accidents, or bruised knees or arms could keep me away from
riding my two-wheeler or car. I thought I was scared of cockroaches, but 12th
grade Biology practical’s forced me to catch them alive, drug them and dissect
them. And to my horror I was good in that and I loved doing that! So there
ended my cockroach fear too.
Pic Credits: Google Images
So
there I was living gloriously thinking that I don’t have fear for anything. But
that came to end when I realized that I was afraid to get hurt emotionally. When
life is going very happily and eventfully with friends and close ones as any
other normal college going girl, with a pinch of “everything is perfect no one
can make it imperfect attitude”, I lost a dear friend of my in an accident. And
that was a blow to my arrogance. That made me conscious that life is not
predictable. Anything can happen to you, me or the person next door. His going
away, made me realize that I, who thought was not afraid of anything, was
actually dreading his absence. I was not ready to accept the person who was
with you this moment would never be visible again. I couldn’t accept that he
won’t be there when we organize a reunion after 10 years. I took that fact so
deeply and started to withdraw from everyone. I was in an impression that, if
you’re not close to anyone, no one can hurt you. I literally closed down
myself, and kept everyone at a safe distance.
Like someone
said, God always have his own ways to do something, and that will be weirdest
way ever. When I thought no one or nothing could hurt me if I stayed away from
people, God proved me wrong in the most unacceptable way. I lost yet another friend
of mine to death. And that was one hard blow to my head. I was hurt like
before. Maybe more, thinking that I could have made much more memories with
this one, if only I had permitted myself. When we buried him, I buried my
stay-away-stay-happy attitude too. Now I know, no matter what you do, no matter
how you live your life, people come and go in your life. Some are just meant to
stay for a while, and some for long. However, when each person leaves you by
choice or by chance, you will feel sad or deeply hurt. And you’ll definitely
miss that person. But if you chose to live the time you had with that one
happily, making memories and do what you want, then you are making yourself and
the other person happy too.
Today I
am not afraid of losing people, because I know when they move away from my
life, I have given them some memories of “us” to take with them. That thought
itself, makes me happy today. Like they say "Dhar ke aage jeet hai" .... and happiness too.
Great insights! We can't allow fear to hinder us from enjoying every minute of the time we have with people right now. So glad you were able to discover that, and then to pass on the wisdom to your readers! Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Some have said that fear of death is the most fundamental, the most primal fear, the basis of all our fears. I hope we can all find inner courage to work around this fear. Thanks Sheethal for this thoughtful post.
I have the same fear, among many other fears ofcourse... I think we all need to seize every moment and live to the fullest to ensure that our fears don't come true...
Wow! That's amazing. I fear for the loss of ear ones too. I lost my favourite uncle three days back and I'm not sure how I'll be able to cope up with that. Thanks, for an insightful post. I'm sure he has some good memories of mine to take it with him.....
Yes, I am sure your uncle is so happy to have spend some wonderful years with you. :) .. Hugs n loads f love. You're strong n you're going to cope up with that beautifully.
I am afraid to get hurt too.. so, sometimes I curl up and don't let anyone in - not a good idea because its frustrating to friends and family.. Your post made me think...
I know exactly what you mean. Thou I'm tagged as an extrovert, my close ones at times there's a wall around which I don't let anyone cross. But these days I try to break that and be more open.
I'm glad I read this because I am declaring my 2015 as a year of breakthroughs and boldness. :) Hope to read more encouraging and motivating posts from you, Sheethal. Have a great new year!
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Great insights! We can't allow fear to hinder us from enjoying every minute of the time we have with people right now. So glad you were able to discover that, and then to pass on the wisdom to your readers! Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your words Laurel. :)
DeleteSome have said that fear of death is the most fundamental, the most primal fear, the basis of all our fears. I hope we can all find inner courage to work around this fear. Thanks Sheethal for this thoughtful post.
ReplyDeleteThanks Beloo for reading. :) ... I too hope courage rules us rather than fear.
DeleteI have the same fear, among many other fears ofcourse... I think we all need to seize every moment and live to the fullest to ensure that our fears don't come true...
ReplyDeleteI think we definitely should. Life which is not lived to the fullest is a life wasted.
DeleteWow! That's amazing. I fear for the loss of ear ones too. I lost my favourite uncle three days back and I'm not sure how I'll be able to cope up with that. Thanks, for an insightful post. I'm sure he has some good memories of mine to take it with him.....
ReplyDeleteYes, I am sure your uncle is so happy to have spend some wonderful years with you. :) .. Hugs n loads f love. You're strong n you're going to cope up with that beautifully.
DeleteI am afraid to get hurt too.. so, sometimes I curl up and don't let anyone in - not a good idea because its frustrating to friends and family..
ReplyDeleteYour post made me think...
I know exactly what you mean. Thou I'm tagged as an extrovert, my close ones at times there's a wall around which I don't let anyone cross. But these days I try to break that and be more open.
DeleteLoss of loved ones is one of our biggest fear and I believe that must be the toughest fear to tame too!
ReplyDeleteBut one that should be tamed...
DeleteI'm glad I read this because I am declaring my 2015 as a year of breakthroughs and boldness. :)
ReplyDeleteHope to read more encouraging and motivating posts from you, Sheethal. Have a great new year!
Thank you so much for reading. :)
Delete