When
you're not content with your life, even the slightest prickle triggers you.
That's
what is happening with me for some time now. My mood changes in a snap of the
finger just for the most trivial reasons. Maybe someone said something silly,
someone talked too much, took so much of time, traffic, excess work, irritating
bro, over concerned family … anything just anything can make me nasty now.
I had
this undying passionate love for myself. I loved myself so much that I could
make sure that I was happy no matter what. But now that's missing. I like me.
But that's different and the intensity has reduced. I guess... I'm
disappointed. I'm disappointed in myself. When I talk to anyone, positiveness
will be oozing out from me. But deep down I'm this little girl who's lost in
deep woods all alone. I don't want someone to come and rescue me. I want my
inner strength and self-love to come out from its hiding and lead me out. I
want that dislike-ness for everything and everyone around me to evaporate for
good. I loved meeting new people. But now I have lost count of the postponed and ignored and passed on or even
cancelled meetings/calls I had with my friends, new humans, clients or
employees.
I know
this will change.
It's
just the time is not right for me. It’s just life is been a bit of a roller coaster
ride. It’s just there’s too much in my plate now. It’s just I don’t have enough
space to breathe now. It’s just so much of negative thoughts are clogging my
mind.
Simply,
it’s just life is taking a totally different unexpected bumpy route and that’s
taking a toll on me.
But
change is on the way. Or I'll plant as many beautiful plants and tress I can, all along
that bumpy route.
Ok. I’m
stopping here. God! I sound so depressing to myself. And this is one reason I don’t
write anything here anymore.
So to sum up:
So to sum up:
" If you
don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. "
And I hope to do just the same.
