Where art thou, Muse?

One fine day when my life was not doing so fine, out of whim I decided to write about that. And gradually every quietly my blog was born. Initially I was the only person around, but that didn’t bother me. I just wanted a space to scribble down my thoughts. Some time passed and then April came. A-Z challenge happened. It’s a Geminian trait that you commit for anything and everything. Likewise I also did. But fortunately I completed the whole month. There I met many like-minded people and I started writing more, exploring more, getting inspired, got befriended and my blog was blooming. Again A-Z happened and many prompts and challenges and fests too. And some years passed with so much of writing. 

When I started the blog, I was full time student, then a full time working woman in real life. But still I was able to take care of my space. But then I gave up my 9-5 desk job for my own work-space. Slowly work started to eat me up. Books, movies and sleep took up the little free time I got. I didn’t know at the other side of the world, my muse was waiting for me patiently to at least have a glance at him. But I was too busy to attend and eventually he got bored waiting for me, so he took a long vacation! Yes. He did that! I think it’s only a vacation since I believe and truly hope that he can’t really leave me. Can he? 

So here I’m waiting for him to return with some juicy gossips and some dark tales from his almost a yearlong wander life. 

Reflections and Realizations ...

This has been going around in blogosphere for some time now. And it’s been in my drafts also for long now. This was first published in Oprah.com. So this year I decided to write it down at last. These questions make you to reflect upon yourself so thought why not? And here goes …

   1.      What Younger You Would Like About Present You?

         I always wanted to be my own boss. And right now I’m that. Thou I still have some of the ambitions to achieve, soon… very soon.

   2.      The Watched/Read It List

         Currently not reading or watching anything. I regret that, but just too tied up with life and tired to take a break too. But 2016 is going to be different atleast in the case of my reading.

   3.      The Mistake You Never Want to Make

          Follow the mass. Do something because the society demands so.

   4.      Your Ideal Outfit

           Jeans, a nice top, heels/sneakers/flats and a handbag. Anytime of the day or night.

   5.      A Deep, Dark—Shhh—Secret

           I love myself too much. ;)

   6.      The Most Unexpected Compliment You Ever Got

        I got a group of friends who are non-expressive just like me. And any compliment from their side is so unexpected. But two days before when talking to S (one of my close friend’s right from school) he complimented me on being an awesome person. Awe! What more you need? ;)

   7.      That One Quote

         I don’t know whether it’s a quote or something I made up myself, but for long I have been clinging to this one statement whenever I’m not happy. “Whatever happens in life, move on with a Smile.”

   8.      Your True Happiness

        I find happiness when people linked to me are happy, that includes my family, my close friends and my dear ones. 

   9.      Your favorite failure

     Relations that made me give so much … gave me memories and lessons and which actually changed me in a good way, and at the end which took a part of me with them.

   10.  An amendment to the bucket list

          A solo vacation.  

Yes. That's my reflection for now. Don't know what the New year is going to hold for me, and for people round me. But hoping and wishing with all my heart that better and good things comes through all our path in 2016. 

Sarah ...

She stood near her mom's grave. When she drew her last breath Sarah was away in Uni. And it’s been two years since then and this is the first time she's visiting her mom. 

When her father informed about her mom's death, she didn't feel anything. It was as if a chapter was closed all by itself, without any dramas. She never felt any connection with her mom.  Her mom didn't exhibit any motherly affection towards her even when she was a child. And Sarah always felt like a stranger who came out of her mother's womb.

"It's nice to make good memories. And I wished you had done the same with me too." Sarah said out aloud standing next to mom's grave.

Linking this to BAR Wordy Wenesday

Random Scribblings ...

Life is been pretty busy yet slow for the past few months. I have been technically away from blogging after the April challenge. I went for a vacation in June and from there it was kind of a roller-coaster ride. My Evernote is full of uncompleted drafts which I have no idea how to complete and yet I hope to do some other day of my life.

I have been investing my time and energy into a new venture of ours and it seems like at the end of the day I just want to curl up in my bed and sleep! Nothing else matters then. But should add, religiously I take my laptop every night and open MSWord thinking of scribbling something but which results in endless staring at the blinking cursor. Exhausted, I tune myself to a movie and stay glued to it.

I sometimes wish there was this technology where your writings from a notebook get transferred to your PC just-like-that. Likewise, I sometimes wish I could just pack my backpack and go see the world leaving all my obligations and responsibilities. Sometimes life is full of those just-like-that wishes. At times I get this sudden irresistible urge to go somewhere far alone for sometime, or just sleep for a whole day, or be invisible from everything or start up something dramatic or just blog more frequently. I know all these are not so not-possible things. But just mundane very much possible things. I know… I know… but sometimes it’s just difficult. Maybe I’m just too lazy.

Recently a dear friend of mine send me an excerpt from a book. It’s about the author been questioned about his past. The author is proud about the things he has done in his yester-years, but the people around him question the morality in that. What do you think? Personally I believe my past defines me. I have done wrong, took the most stupid decisions, have compromised for less worth things, have hurt my near ones, have suffered the consequences of my doings,  have lost and gained, smiled and cried ... but I don’t regret anything I have done. Maybe if given a chance I might have opted for more subtle decisions when it’s concerned with other people. But still I believe our yesterdays are just are learning days were we gain courage to grow. Hope we all gain strength from our past and have the courage and energy to live our present with a dream of brighter tomorrows. 

So what is your take on this? And is your day going on?

Linking this to Write Tribe #MondayMusings

Wake-Up Call

When a little boy came with a small bucket and spade, all business like, she got curious. He just looked all-around and settled down at a spot which felt best for him. And there he started building his castle out of sand. She felt as if he was showing her life being built. Carefully and patiently he was drawing the castle's perimeter in the sand and then he mounded a big pile of sand inside it. After that he made a hole in the center, filled it with water, and tamped it down. Slowly he added layers of sand and water until he had a firm and level mound. Then when was all set to finish a huge tide came and washed off half of his sand castle. He was going to scream his lungs out of sadness, she was betting on that. But she was amused when he angrily glared at the sea and started rebuilding his castle again, as if telling the sea that nothing could stop him from making him finish what he started. And that was the wake-up call for her, to rebuild her life again, to rejuvenate herself and start fresh. 

Linking this to BAR Wordy Wednesday.

Letters Of Love

Have you ever thought of making a difference here in this world with your life? Yes, I have… and it’s always my deepest desire. But there’s always a difference between dreaming and actually taking an effort and doing it. 

When we all empathize about the terrible things that’s happening round us, beautiful people like Pooja Pradeep just takes that extra step to ensure that something positive is been directed towards the affected people. And here she is doing her bit and letting others to be a part of that and making that something huge for those who receive them.

More than 50% of Syrian refugees are children. The youngest are confused and scared by their experiences, lacking the sense of safety and home they need. The older children are forced to grow up too fast, finding work and taking care of their family in desperate circumstances. They don’t even know why they have to go through all this. They don’t have anyone to comfort, say a word of encouragement or express any emotion of love and here comes Letters of Love. I came to know about this beautiful initiative from Roshan’s blog and what more reason one need to look into something a friend believes in. Letters of Love is an initiative to collect smiles and love from across the world and translate it to Arabic and send to the little ones in Syria. 

 Pooja with the postcards :)

The idea is to deliver all these post cards via the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees to the children across various refugee camps by NEW YEAR 2015. So you just have to search for that happiest picture of yours, write and write a happy positive note with loads of love and inbox it to Letters of Love. And they’ll convert it to postcard with a handwritten note by mid-December.

The images could be anything positive -

•         Your best smile
•         Blowing a kiss
•         You and your friends
•         You with your pets
•         You holding flowers
•         Words - cheery and feel good in tone, ideally, rather than taking on a sympathetic voice.

Things to avoid –

•         Selfies (they may get cropped while converting into post card format)
•       Images with food or materialistic goods (it may hit a raw nerve for a child who has lost everything)
•         Obscene gestures. 

Christmas is always the season of celebrations and hope. Let’s celebrate this December by letting the love and hope and warmth spread across borders to those who need them the most.

Hope you’ll join in too. 

A Snippet from the Past ...

5 Aug 2009

It’s almost two in the morning. The air is so warm that the comforter was suffocating me. I’ve been trying to sleep for hours, but despite the tiredness sleep fails me yet another night. Sleep hasn’t visited me in days and how I hate these long nights. I hate this insomnia. Sleep is a getaway from everything everyone and reality. I don’t feel like staying back when I’m awake, which I’m for days now. I just feel like running away, to that far away island in the north or go road trekking in some strange country or in a café with cups and cups of coffee writing my heart out in the midst of foreign language or volunteering in a village in some under developed country. These were plans in my to-do-list for years. But somehow along the road the to-do-list of living life turned to just surviving. I never understood myself. One minute I’ll be sipping life as if it’s the sweetest nectar I have never tasted and the other moment I’ll be in this deep dark pitch screaming silently to be unseen and unknown. But till when …  

Liza turned to the next page and to the other but to find them all blank.