Showing posts with label World Suicide Prevention Day. Show all posts
Showing posts with label World Suicide Prevention Day. Show all posts

Thursday, September 11, 2014

Connect and Stay Together ...




Dear Son,

Happy Birthday to you!

You would have been 21 if you were still here, with us. Now as you are in a place where age is not a factor (believe so) you are still 20 and going to be that forever.

Yesterday we thought to celebrate your day, by getting your favorite cake. But didn’t have the strength to actually do that. How could we buy your favorite chocolate cake and have it without you near us? Arnav came home in the morning. He misses you. Said you were his best friend and no one else seems to be able to fill that position. I think no one can take someone else’s place in a person’s life. Whoever comes in my and your mom’s life, nothing can replace you, my son. No other relations gives us the joy that came from been your parents. But guess we never realized that before. Or we never made you realize that.

I never knew how unhappy you were with your life. When you moved on taking our dreams and leaving yours aside, I thought you were happy and made new dreams to fly after. I never saw that the smile had disappeared from your last two years photographs. Before that, all your pictures were filled with your warm smile. I never noticed all those status updates in your page, even when I have liked and commented in some. I thought it was the poetic side of yours, but never guessed even for a second that those were the exact thoughts you wanted to convey to me. I could not even grieve thinking you never told me anything. Because you did. In your own small ways.  But it was me who ignored them as if they were nothing. I am sorry dear son.

Now I remember you calling me to say how unhappy you felt there and how you find it very difficult to adjust. But when I told you to stay strong and it was my dream to see you coming out from there with excellence and not in failure, you said you are fine and going to be ok. I never realized that you were actually not fine and those words were just to calm me down. If only I heard you then. If only I took that extra step to hug you and listen to you, you would have been still here beside me. We miss you so much. The thought that if we had connected with you, if we had listened to your heart, talked to you, understood you … this letter wouldn’t be in my drafts, hoping that you would read this, from somewhere behind the clouds.

I love you my son. More than anything in this world or beyond.

Love,
Dad.


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The above letter is purely fictional, thou inspired from something I read in a FB page. 



But, if ever you don’t want to write something like that to your child, better half, parents, siblings, friends or anyone near or far and save it in your drafts under the folder “Unsent Letters” … take that one step to connect with people around you. Not the now famous connect with likes or a one-word comment in a picture in FB/Whatsapp/Instagram/G+/countless other social networking sites, but in a real way. Talk to people who mean something to you, listen to them, and make sure they are happy and satisfied with their life.  

To end up your own life you need so much courage. Imagine cutting your wrist or jumping from that height or blasting up your head … doesn’t it gives a shiver down your spine just at the mere thought of these. Then think of those people who actually might have thought for days or maybe months for a way to end up their life. Those sleepless nights they might have spend hoping someone could actually see through their fake smile or listen to what they have to say. 


We never see the symptoms, or the signs people show us, in fact we ignore them knowingly. But once something bad happens, the regret is endless.  Parents’ never hear their children, children rarely open up to their parents, siblings often fail to be in touch, friends drift apart and everyone gets so busy in life that there’s no time for a second person. Not even to the one who’s living with you, shares your bed space and your life. Take some time from your busy schedule to actually be with your loved ones. Be there to hear out their fears, loneliness and just make them feel loved and wanted and secure. We can't bear losing our dear ones, then why not prevent that from happening. 





We are blogging for this cause at Write Tribe. Do read and spread the awareness. Thank You.



Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Suicide is Permanent but not our Problems.


Dear Dad,

Can I ask how you are? I know, I, your pride, sweet stubborn, little girl, who broke your heart to thousand irreparable pieces, have no right to ask you such a question.

I am sorry Dad. But don't hate me, please...

I don't know whether I am in heaven or hell or anywhere else. When I left my earthly body and came here, I was greeted by an Angel. He showed me what happened after I left. He showed how, while everyone was crying out their loss, you were clutching to my lifeless cold hands and asking in your mind, “Why? Why you did this? .... Why?”

Dad, I didn't knew, I would cause this pain in you.

I tried to be strong. I tried to ignore everything that was happening to me. I tried to look at the brighter side and move on, but Dad, I didn't see anything or anyone. All I saw was, pitch black darkness around me. I know, I let you down. Life didn't turn out the way everyone and I thought it would be. Life just started losing all it colors. Never in life I felt that lonely, like that, one moment. Never till then, I wanted someone to hug me and just be with me.

With more than thousand friends in FB and hundreds in my phone list, I didn't find one person I could share myself with, or just cry to without any inhibitions. I tried to talk to you, but didn't want to burden you. I thought you would understand without me saying anything, but no. When I smiled and laughed you thought I was OK and happy. But with every smile I was losing hope.

Dad, the Angel here, showed how my life would have turned out, if I didn't surrender to that dark moment. I saw how everything would have been OK with time. Saw "my supposed to happen" wedding day. And Dad, I looked beautiful ;) and you were dashing too. And you were so openly, shamelessly proud and beaming and telling all the people around, "it's my little girl's big day"... haha... Dad, you looked so cute then.

And Dad, you know what, I was to have a baby girl, like I always wanted. I saw the happy tears you had in your eyes, while holding your grandchild with utter most softness. And you were to be her favorite grandparent. My life, "if it wasn't for suicide" just played in front of my eyes like a movie.

I'm so sorry; I made you miss all this from life. I destroyed every ounce of happiness that was to happen, just because, I couldn't bear a moment's pain. I couldn't think straight. I just lost myself that one moment. One moment that changed everything.

I wish... if it was all just a dream. I wish... I didn't do it. I wish, I was not dead. Dad, I want to come back to you. I want to live my life. I wish, I was still alive.

But once dead is always dead.

I don't know if I'll have one more life as a human. But, if I am blessed with one, I want to be your little girl once more. And I promise... I promise whatever happens, how bad life turns out; I would never ever leave you like this.

I don't know how this letter of mine will reach you. But this angel promised to deliver this to you promptly. Maybe through a dream! However it is, I just want let you know how sorry I'm... but Dad, you are the best father a daughter could dream of and I love you implicitly.


Your Little Girl forever!




This is written for Write Tribe for a cause in which we all want to make a difference. 

World Suicide Prevention Day-September 10.

Please us the hashtag #suicideprevention to tweet/share on Facebook.




                                  If you or a friend are considering suicide please call the 

                National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273- (8255). It is free and confidential. Please Talk!