These
mornings I wake up with a sinking feeling in my pit.
I
feel like heavy weights been kept on my shoulders and knees. As if something is
pulling me down further into the folds of bed and not allowing me to get up. I am not sad, but just empty. Still,
I wake up every day, fighting the invisible demons.
Yet
the mornings feel blanched. When the cold shower hits my face and body, I feel
cold and tears start rolling down my eyes making it indistinguishable from the
water. But once the shower stops I could literally feel the demons, frustration
and irritation, creeping down my feet to the top, as if some snake is crawling.
You
know what I did?
I
ignored. I went my way. I made myself busy. So busy that I didn't take time to
breath.
And I
kept doing this.
For
hours initially,
Then for
days.
For
months.
Today he
said my face looked drained out. Said I lost the life I had in my smile. Said
that he could see lines and wrinkles and before I could mention age, he denied.
I laughed off.
But
Is it the
snake that causing me this? Did it reach my face when I kept myself busy
ignoring its existence? Is it going to choke me?
Is this
how you failure feels like?
Is it how
giving up looks like?
She closed her child’s journal and sank under the
bed-cover hoping for the sleep to embrace her. But the mind kept reminding her
that tomorrow it’s going to be a year since she lost her child to those invisible
demons.
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This is Post #6
Loneliness and depression can be so debilitating. Such a sad story.
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
Deletevery nice
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Thank you :)
DeleteBeautifully written and so sad.
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
DeleteHow incredibly, gut-wrenchingly sad.
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
Deletesad tale :(
ReplyDeleteThank you for reading. :)
DeleteVery nicely weaved tale, Sheetal. You have brought out the pain and the ordeal very nicely.
ReplyDeleteVery well written Sheethal. I wish parents found out these journals before getting too late
ReplyDelete