Thursday, September 11, 2014

Connect and Stay Together ...




Dear Son,

Happy Birthday to you!

You would have been 21 if you were still here, with us. Now as you are in a place where age is not a factor (believe so) you are still 20 and going to be that forever.

Yesterday we thought to celebrate your day, by getting your favorite cake. But didn’t have the strength to actually do that. How could we buy your favorite chocolate cake and have it without you near us? Arnav came home in the morning. He misses you. Said you were his best friend and no one else seems to be able to fill that position. I think no one can take someone else’s place in a person’s life. Whoever comes in my and your mom’s life, nothing can replace you, my son. No other relations gives us the joy that came from been your parents. But guess we never realized that before. Or we never made you realize that.

I never knew how unhappy you were with your life. When you moved on taking our dreams and leaving yours aside, I thought you were happy and made new dreams to fly after. I never saw that the smile had disappeared from your last two years photographs. Before that, all your pictures were filled with your warm smile. I never noticed all those status updates in your page, even when I have liked and commented in some. I thought it was the poetic side of yours, but never guessed even for a second that those were the exact thoughts you wanted to convey to me. I could not even grieve thinking you never told me anything. Because you did. In your own small ways.  But it was me who ignored them as if they were nothing. I am sorry dear son.

Now I remember you calling me to say how unhappy you felt there and how you find it very difficult to adjust. But when I told you to stay strong and it was my dream to see you coming out from there with excellence and not in failure, you said you are fine and going to be ok. I never realized that you were actually not fine and those words were just to calm me down. If only I heard you then. If only I took that extra step to hug you and listen to you, you would have been still here beside me. We miss you so much. The thought that if we had connected with you, if we had listened to your heart, talked to you, understood you … this letter wouldn’t be in my drafts, hoping that you would read this, from somewhere behind the clouds.

I love you my son. More than anything in this world or beyond.

Love,
Dad.


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The above letter is purely fictional, thou inspired from something I read in a FB page. 



But, if ever you don’t want to write something like that to your child, better half, parents, siblings, friends or anyone near or far and save it in your drafts under the folder “Unsent Letters” … take that one step to connect with people around you. Not the now famous connect with likes or a one-word comment in a picture in FB/Whatsapp/Instagram/G+/countless other social networking sites, but in a real way. Talk to people who mean something to you, listen to them, and make sure they are happy and satisfied with their life.  

To end up your own life you need so much courage. Imagine cutting your wrist or jumping from that height or blasting up your head … doesn’t it gives a shiver down your spine just at the mere thought of these. Then think of those people who actually might have thought for days or maybe months for a way to end up their life. Those sleepless nights they might have spend hoping someone could actually see through their fake smile or listen to what they have to say. 


We never see the symptoms, or the signs people show us, in fact we ignore them knowingly. But once something bad happens, the regret is endless.  Parents’ never hear their children, children rarely open up to their parents, siblings often fail to be in touch, friends drift apart and everyone gets so busy in life that there’s no time for a second person. Not even to the one who’s living with you, shares your bed space and your life. Take some time from your busy schedule to actually be with your loved ones. Be there to hear out their fears, loneliness and just make them feel loved and wanted and secure. We can't bear losing our dear ones, then why not prevent that from happening. 





We are blogging for this cause at Write Tribe. Do read and spread the awareness. Thank You.



26 comments :

  1. An emotional letter on suicide that kills dreams. If only we cared to listen!

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  2. Great cause and a heart warming post you wrote to support it.
    It's always better to convey things before it is too late.
    Lovely work of fiction Sheethal! :)

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  3. The letter was really touching and yes instead of feeling remorse in the end one should try to lend an ear to their loved ones

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  4. The survivors have their own living hell, don't they? A great perspective, Sheetal. Thanks for adding your unique voice to this effort.

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    1. Yes, they have... but no one hears that much....
      Thanks to you for taking the initiative, Corinne. :)

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  5. This was really a touching post. You're right, sometimes just reaching out for a person who needs it the most, goes a long way in getting him out of the depths of such trauma.

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    1. Thanks Vinodini :) .. Hope we could make so difference..

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  6. It's so very important to listen and to be there. Thanks for sharing your perspective.

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  7. Your letter is so touching. I could feel the grief of the parent. It's necessary that people, friends or parents, connect at an emotional level with the depressed person. Instead of advising they need to listen and understand what they are going through. With love and care, even the most depressing feeling can be cured.
    Wonderful post.

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    1. Thanks Rajlakshmi. Saying is easy... but if only we could make it practical too....

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  8. Oh my! Sheethal, I thought this was a true story and was so saddened by it, for you, thinking that it was your son. I'm glad it is not, though I realize it could be anyone's story. You obviously write really well for me to believe that it was a true story! Keep on writing! :) <3

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  9. This is another side of the story...How hard and full of regret the lives of those left behind turn out to be...A great and balanced post Sheetal..

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  10. That's just more heartbreaking when you can see that the son tried to tell his parents in so many ways what he was going through! I hope I never try to foist my dreams onto my kids!! :(

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  11. I'm sure there are many parents going through this same turmoil. right now! That letter illustrates very well that we must remain connected to our loved ones and pay attention to what they are saying.

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