Sunday, July 15, 2012

Miss you Home.



My place is always my own. Here 'm a stranger, a tourist in an unknown land, who came to seek the gold pot at the end of the rainbow. But till now not even the rainbow has come out of its hiding place.


I was a person who cheered for Pakistan in cricket and who prayed India to lose her crown in Miss World (but i was just 6years, so guess it can be forgiven).


But now after living with her for more than half of my life i began to respect her, take pride in been her daughter, to have a space in her land and to be known to others as hers.


When compared to this strange land she may not have the perfect silky roads. But i can go where ever i want or walk till my feet ache and without fearing any sun stroke.


She maynot have sophisticated malls and hangouts. But the street chaats and exhibition grounds reveal part of her soul, culture and lot of memories.


She may not have a 10 on 10 ruling authority but everyone enjoys the power. She doesn't show partiality in religions. For her every religion is the same and everyone is her child.


She doesn't believe in monopoly. A different telecom company is born every day offering the least call rates or even zero rates for their existence. But due to which I can actually talk to my people without checking my credit thrice in five minutes.


Her shopping outlets may not be air conditioned but they won’t burn a hole in your pockets.


She may not provide a stable electric power 24x7, but always opens the door to the freshness of nature.


The rain at her place may ruin your plans but keeps you cool during your grumpiest hour and will be your companion in solitude.


The beaches may not be seen with white sand, palm trees and calm, clear, blue water but it comforts and soothes your soul.


After dark it may not be safe to roam about in her land, but the courage and feeling of independence she provides is immense.


The street eat-outs won't be providing you with international cuisines but will serve you with a genuine smile.


The people in her land even thou a bit narrow minded, value family and relations above their job, status or worldly pleasures.


It’s said, ‘You don't realize the value of something unless u lose it.' Here i didn't lose anything, rather i gained knowledge of the love and passion i have for my place. The land which provided space for every mood swings of mine.


My country is not perfect, but she is mine and she makes me feel at home.


Whenever i came back to you in the past, you welcomed me warm heartedly and the nectar from the skies embraced me.


I miss u.


I just miss being with you.



P.S. Keep Smiling.


God Blez.






Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Expressions

 



I talked to you last night

Like old days

We smiled, shared, fought and loved



But in my Dreams.




P.S. I miss you.

I am....

At the moment i am in love with Myself. Self love is the important love, no. So thought of scribble down about Myself.

So here it goes...............

Named as Sheethal Susan Jacob in all the official records. Called by loved and near ones as ... whatever they feel like at that moment. :/
I am complicated yet easy going, fun loving to the core, solitude seeker, not soo silent, serene and stubborn. :D
I love Rain & hate umbrellas.
I love people (White, black, grey, men, women, kids,….)
I am a good listener and a very good talkative.
I am optimist in talks, realistic in actions and a pessimist in thoughts.
I love travelling and want to travel whole around the world. (Wish list)
I love Driving and Riding.
Books - My obsession. I love reading and writing.
I always try to see the good in people and I trust people without judging them.
I am the solution seeker to my close ones but I do complain but only to myself.
I HATE when people say “you can’t do that … you can’t go there… because you are a Girl”.
I try 200% to keep a promise and expect the same from others.
I love being wild. I try to live the moment.
I believe in God, Nature and Karma.
I live life in my own way with my set of rules bit greatly influenced by the Smiles of my family.
J

Now the other side me: Dark traits (you are welcome to ignore from this part)

I am Stubborn (at times ‘m proud of that :P)
I am worst person to have around when I am in my bad mood.
I can be my parents’ sweetest daughter and also the sourest.
I am lazy & hate waking up early morning.
I hate someone waking me from my sleep.
I am hot tempered. Sensitive.
I get bored easily (Geminian traits, ‘m helpless in this).
I am naughty (24*7). Childish (often). Stupid (sometimes).
I hate when others take my things or enter my room without permission. (i do try to change... but still i get irritated)

Whatever it is I love ME soo much… because no one can do that role better than me. :D

Last but never the least :
Whatever happens move on with a Smile. Do good. Live life BIG.

Now, that’s a bit of information about me. All these are subjected to change at any time.


P.S. Keep Smiling.
P.S.S. God Bless.

Monday, July 2, 2012

Craving for a Change.


She was someone who took life as it comes. Thou life was not the Best it was Beautiful. Obviously, it had its ups and downs but it didn't stop her from been happy. She was a stubborn, pampered n rotten, childish and a happy girl. But during the journey of life she lost a close person of hers to death. It hit her. It hit her BIG time. It made her fall from the top of the world to the black hole deep down from where seeing any ray of light was just impossible.  Even now at times she just blankness out of reality. It made her look at life in a new way... in a horrible way. Made her drift away from human, God and even herself. She was angry at God.  At everything and anything.
There were countless of sleepless nights and also in-numerous nights when she used to cry herself to sleep. She knew that what happened cannot be erased and she had to live with it till the end. But knowing is something different from living it.

As time passed she learned to live with the loss... but by that time she had changed... it was as if all the positive energy had just drained out of her.

But that one incident made her strong.

Now moving aside all the negatives she decided to be her old self. It might take time... but trying is more worthy than letting go.






Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Student to Professional.



At last!!!
I am writing about my first job. Congrats to me.  J
I joined a firm in Middle East which is basically Turkish, where I am the youngest and the one of the two Indians. Good people, Good working environment. And am I satisfied with work??  Will comment about that in next three months.

 But still am happy about the feeling of getting up in the morning and going off to WORK!!



Sunday, June 17, 2012

OUR day !!!


JUNE 16!!! Yesterday it's been 23 years since i stepped on this earth.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME !!!!

Four years back i met someone unexpectedly who shares the same birthday with me. We became close and promised each other to celebrate not just the b'thdays but the future together. But we couldn't make it that year as we were on two different countries of the same continent. But we made it up by wishing each other @ 12 on dot. But two months after that he just vanished to a place beyond my reach... a place from where noone came back ever... a place to where no one can go until he's called.

This is the 3rd June after he went. Every day, every hour n every sec i wish to be waken up from a dream to your voice... but that still remains as a dream itself.

But i still celebrate every day with you itself... my mornings... my happiness... smiles... tears... everything !!! So this birthday is also celebrated with you.... every sec.

Many Many happy returns of OUR special day.

U were missed sooo very much.... and no words can describe that.




...



Sunday, June 10, 2012



The clock knocked me down to reality. Waking me up from my dreams and reminding me that now I’m in reality. Reality where am I now. 


A place of vaccum … A place where I do all my pretendences… A place of perfection… A place where I dread to be…  A place where I changed myself totally… but from where am not able to sneak out from…

Here I miss everything and everyone… it makes me question my very existence… I wanna travel the road less travelled… but here I’m forced to choose the other way… the safe secure world.

When everything and everyone is missed… it starts right from the first person to the last and all the moments spend with everyone…