Sunday, February 14, 2016

Tug of War between Single and Married!


"Marriages get better or worse. They won't stand still." Yes, I got married! 

Today is the 15th day of my new life. (Thank you for all the wishes… with a huge smile.) I have been neglecting my blog for months now. Last time I posted something was on Dec 31. And I got this huge guilt feeling for ignoring my space. I’m sorry my dear. But situations were not so easy and the limitation in technology just made it worse.

Right now, I’m in my hometown in regard of my engagement, wedding and the related events. Do I enjoy this new addition in my life? The change in my status? Actually I’m yet to say I’m in love with the changes. No! Don’t take me wrong. It’s not that I don’t enjoy been married, I do, thou we both have all the inhibitions two persons go through when they walk down the initial days of an arranged marriage. But the thing I miss most is the word “Single”. Been a very independent female, who used to do everything as per her own decisions, time and space, I find it a bit difficult to accommodate another soul so close to my premises. I enjoy my me-times, shopping, friends’ zone and everything at my own pace and structure. And all of a sudden there comes a change in that. And the best part is the partner is so ready to give me all those, but the family and the society is just too keen in our lives.

Since both of our places are not too far, we keep shuttling between both houses. And one day he went from mine to his to get some documents, and he was supposed to be back after some time. But unfortunately he got sick and without thinking much I suggested to take rest if he can’t drive back. And that single statement made my whole clan to call me up the following days and literally took my peace away. They assumed we fought and that’s why we were in separate homes for the night. And the facts that he returned the next morning even before I woke up, didn’t even fall on their ears. And then today I went the morning mass with my mom as always and he been sick didn’t join me. Right after the mass, every aunties wanted to know where the hubby is, they couldn’t digest the fact that I came alone for the mass. I mean… seriously?!

Does the word privacy, space, individuality just evaporate when you say I do? Or do we actually have to fight with the world to keep them close? At times, no, most of the times, I find myself playing a tug of war between single and married. When my mind decides to do something with me alone, brain immediately sends alert that YOU’RE MARRIED in red bold letters.

Changes are inevitable in life. And that’s the essence of life too. But some changes happen to us all of a sudden and you’re in a mid-state of not able to accept yet have to accept situation. And that’s life. I know life changes after marriage. But people can't expect you to be someone different altogether in a day. Anyways I don't intend to. And as far as I know, the partner also feels the same. And that's what it's all about nah?

Wishing peace and happiness to all. And I believe that's what we're seeking with this whole life thing. 





21 comments :

  1. First of congrats on a new life and secondly society always has something to talk about (blah!!)

    As long as you and your better half happy...laugh it off!
    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Ruchira :).... yeah that's what I'm doing now. :)

      Delete
  2. Wishing you happiness once again, Sheethal :) As for the wagging tongues, trust me, this is just the beginning. Don't take any of it too seriously. What matters is if you two are comfortable with one another. People will talk anyway :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Shailaja :) Yes... people just keeps talking nonsense.

      Delete
  3. Oh I'm so happy to see you back!! Single or married - your are still you and you always will be- so stick to your core of what's YOU...My dear - and keep writing:-)Sending big hugs and all good wishes and thoughts:-)

    ReplyDelete
  4. People seriously need to get a life. It's irritating when every little thing, each action is put under the scanner and the worst possible scenario is assumed to be true. You have a good life Sheethal and let the fuddy duddys be.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So true Tulika... People need to get a life.

      Thanks Tulika for the wishes. :)

      Delete
  5. Hearty congratulations! Yes, marriage involves a lot of change, some of it really beautiful. As far as people are concerned, just ignore. Wish you a lot of happiness.

    ReplyDelete
  6. woaa... you got some really snoopy aunties over there. They need to get a life.
    On another note, wish you a very happy married life :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Seriously Raj, I got some really snoopy people around me. And thank you :)

      Delete
  7. People really need to chill in my life. It happens with me so many times. Last year, I took a trip with my parents and siblings to Dubai. Husband was busy work and so couldn't join. The entire community was judging me to leave my husband behind and going for the trip. Few of them even came up with suggestions as to how I should not take further trips anywhere without my husband, they thought something was wrong with my marriage, that's why my husband didn't come along, or my parents didn't take him along! Lol.. Can you beat that. I attend so many of friends weddings by myself because of the different work schedule of me and my husband and that is totally cool with us, I don't understand why does it bothers the society so much! It's simply annoying at times..

    But you don't worry.. Do as you feel works for you as a couple and that is the best thing to do. The rest will anyway be there to judge and crib and judge again!

    Cheers

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just a month into marriage, I have heard some similar things. If I go shopping alone or with friends, then it's "How can the new bride go shopping alone?" ... I'm like "seriously??"... If you're married you have to be clued to each other always, that's the common attitude of the society.

      Delete
  8. Many many congratulations, love! I know, can understand what you are going through. Just a passing phase. Love awaits! :) Happy married life and be in love. Now and Always! :)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Congratulations... this too shall pass...
    Looking forward to read more !

    ReplyDelete
  10. Congrts ... Wish you a wonderful and exciting marriage life : Sinoy

    ReplyDelete